(Pictured above is Kim Scharf (left) with friends.)
Finding out you have a health issue is never easy. When the diagnosis is something serious like cancer, it can be terrifying. But when she was battling breast cancer in 2013, Auburn nurse Kim Scharf got by with a little help from her supportive friends and co-workers plus her family.
What led to your breast cancer diagnosis?
I was diagnosed July 15, 2013, while I was on a family trip to Yellowstone and Glacier Mountain. I felt a lump about two months before that but kept wanting to believe that it didn’t exist. Finally, when I did go in for a mammogram, I had to get an ultrasound and needle biopsy that day, which was two days before I was leaving for my trip. The radiologist called me three days into my trip and broke the bad news. I had stage 2B, ER + and HR + breast cancer. It was a two-week vacation that we were on, so by the time we got back in town, I had all my appointments setup and was ready for surgery. I had a double mastectomy and did four months of chemotherapy. I also had to get Herceptin infusions once a month for another year due to my tumor being HR +.
What was your first thought when you heard the diagnosis?
I was terrified and scared. My husband was ready to end the trip to go back and start treatment right away, but I wanted to keep going because I wasn’t sure if this would be the last trip we took together.
Through the treatment process and after, what did you want and need from your friends and family?
I wanted love and support and affirmation that everything was going to be alright.
What forms of help and support really stood out?
My husband and children made me feel beautiful. On the day that we (my husband and I) decided to shave my head because I had lost so much hair, I will never forget when my son came home from school, he ran up to me, kissed me, and told me how pretty I was. My husband was very supportive and went with me to every treatment.
My coworkers were extremely supportive. I came back to work not long after I started chemo treatments. The staff all wore hats and scarves on my first day back to make me feel good. Since I worked in the hospital where I received treatment, I always had a friend or coworker coming to see me during treatment. Every day, someone was either texting me or calling me to see how I was.
Those small gestures made a world of difference to me. There was one person in particular, who is a fellow breast cancer survivor, who told me something that changed my whole outlook on treatments. She told me, “There is life after this!” That gave me a whole new positive outlook on things.
There was one person in particular, who is a fellow breast cancer survivor, who told me something that changed my whole outlook on treatments. She told me, ‘there is life after this!’ That gave me a whole new positive outlook on things.
What one thing that you did for yourself most helped you cope? Prayer. Someone sent me this scripture on the morning of my mastectomy and it really helped a lot: Philippians 4:6 “Don’t worry about anything; instead pray about everything.” Also, having a positive attitude helped a lot.
What advice would you give other caregivers/spouse/parents/friends, etc., on how to approach and help their loved one going through cancer treatment? I would say just be there for them. Even if it’s just sitting next to them during chemo or sending them a text to say “Hey.” Don’t ever let them feel like they’re alone in this battle.
Small gestures made a world of difference to me.